Author: Julie Lotarski Page 5 of 11

*Note- This is an edited and improved post from last Easter. I didn’t feel I did our girl Philomena justice so this is version 2.0.

I don’t think I had ever heard of St. Philomena before the days of April 7, 2016.  That was when our infant daughter London was admitted into the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU), and we frantically began searching for the right patron saint to pray to for her intercession.  We quickly came across St. Philomena, patron saint of infants, babies and youth and began to pray fervently.  Now some have asked why St. Philomena, and not someone such as St. Jude?  Honestly, I don’t really remember how we landed on St. Philomena, but I think it was my brother.  I remember him telling me her name meant “Loved one” and how he felt that was so fitting for London. 

My first order of business after selecting St. Philomena was to locate her parishes and send family and friends on our behalf to pray and light candles.  There was St. Philomena Parish in New Jersey, where my husband’s cousin lived.  There was St. Philomena Parish in Peoria where my college roommate’s mother lived.  Thirdly, there was St. Philomena Parish in Chicago which my brother visited before I could even ask.  Within days all three parishes were visited with candles lit.  I must say the Chicago location was my favorite story as it was in a not-so-nice part of town and was locked even in the middle of the day.  My brother had to walk all around the building trying to find someone to let him in.  Finally, he found success but was told to pray and get out of the area as soon as possible. 

St. Philomena is known as an imitator of Mary due to her heroic virtues of purity, obedience, and humility.  Therefore, most of my prayers were to Mary and St. Philomena in tandem while we were in the PICU.  I prayed the rosary almost incessantly for those three weeks.  I felt so connected to Mary and St. Philomena while there, that I was certain they would intercede on behalf of my daughter’s life.    However, after returning home without my baby, I felt abandoned by St. Philomena, or worse, duped by her mere existence.   

If you begin researching St. Philomena online, you will find varying information.  She is a topic of controversy and was removed from the calendar of the saints in 1961 (along with 14 other saints) due to doubts of her story’s accuracy. Her legend does make some bold claims including survival of three assassination attempts that were curtailed by angels before her ultimate beheading.  However, it is important to note that never did the Holy See suppress devotion to St. Philomena or try to deny her existence.  Therefore, we still have schools and parishes named in her honor.  Despite her controversy, she has some of the most loyal followers of all the saints. 

Oftentimes I have been told to pay attention when you open a book of faith, that your focus will be directed intentionally.  As I have been reading my grandmother’s Dictionary of Saints, I keep finding myself randomly opening to the page of St. Philomena.  Also, when scanning the “saints” section in my Hallow App my eyes seem to always locate the St. Philomena tab, or names associated with her such as John Vianney and Padre Pio.  Therefore, I have been motivated to further investigate this topic.    

The bare minimum that seems to be agreed upon is the following.  In 1802, the bones of a teenage girl were found under tiles that read, “Peace be with you, Philomena,” along with a symbol of a palm and a vial of dried blood (both symbolizing martyrdom).  Once her bones were exhumed miracles began happening and her final resting place is the Shrine at Our Lady of Grace Church in Mugnano, Italy. 

The interesting thing is that although there have been countless miracles associated with Philomena as well as revelations detailing her life to multiple holy people, there really is no concrete evidence of her earthly life.  Lack of proof is hard for people, myself included, which is why I have spent the day fact-checking Philomena and trying to find proof. 

The story goes that Mary said to John Vianney in a vision, “To Philomena, nothing is refused.”  I’m not going to lie, this makes me rather salty, because 7 years ago, I would claim that I was refused.  Although I now feel a sort of kinship with Philomena on the premise of never getting to tell her story.  This seems to parallel the lives of babies taken too soon who never had the opportunity to live out their earthly lives and therefore tell their story.  Maybe THAT is what she needs to be the patron saint of.  Saint of untold stories.      

After spending the day wondering about the authenticity of her various life details, I’m left to the conclusion that, maybe we were meant to wonder for a purpose.  Maybe her mystery is what makes her so popular.  If millions of people worldwide have prayed to Philomena and found refuge, then that’s proof enough for me.  In fact, mystery is fitting for Philomena, as she is the protectress of the living rosary, which contains twenty mysteries! 

Honestly, in hindsight I feel guilty about doubting St. Philomena.  For in the hospital, I felt her.  She was there, with Mary, comforting me.  I know it in my heart.  To quote a less controversial saint, “To those with faith, no evidence is necessary; for those without it, no evidence will suffice.”   St. Thomas Aquinas. 

Whenever I sit down to watch sports with my husband the questions I inevitably ask aren’t about sports at all, but character.

How many of these guys do you think cheat on their wives?

What are the divorce statistics in professional sports? 

Is it possible to reach that level of success and remain grounded? 

Many people call Jrue Holiday underrated because of his talent on the basketball court, but I would say he is underrated because of what he does off the court. The more I read about him the more I like him. 

Jrue Holiday is a man of Christian Faith.  He has a spotlight on Halo titled, “Relying on God” in which he also speaks on the importance of relying on others and standing with others. 

In 2016, Jrue took an indeterminate leave from the New Orleans Pelicans when his pregnant wife was found to have a brain tumor.  During this time Jrue and his wife Lauren grew closer in their faith together as they leaned on God.  In the end Jrue missed 12 regular season games, when he returned his team was 2-10.  In our society we tend to praise those who sacrifice their personal lives for their professional success, and not the other way around.  As an all-star point guard, I imagine Jrue felt a lot of pressure and mixed emotions about being away from his team that depended on him so much.  Yet even after his extended absence he has managed to affirm his reputation as one of the most selfless and committed players in the league.  Derrick White has been quoted crediting Jrue for his offensive success and Jrue was voted NBA teammate of the year in 2020, 2022, and 2023. 

Lastly, if you’re wondering if Jrue is the real deal or not just know this.  When asked in an interview what a key factor was in affirming his faith, he described the early days of his career reading psalms with his mom on her way to work in the morning.  Oh, and his mom is a teacher.  Ok, this teacher boy mom just ate that up with a spoon!  God Bless you Jrue!    

“To have and to hold, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.” 

During today’s Sunday Sermon Father Mike Schmitz points out that when a couple says their vows, there is no way of knowing what they are saying yes to, only who they are saying yes to.  The same can be said of our life following Jesus.  Just as our marriage life might not be what we expected, our spiritual purpose may not be what we bargained for.  Bargaining, that’s another thing us Catholics are good at. 

When my daughter London was dying in the hospital, I had my expectations, and I tried my bargaining because I thought I knew best.  I expected God to reward my virtuous life by saving my daughter with a recovery so miraculous the medical world would have no way of explaining it other than divine intervention.  This was my going to be spiritual purpose in life.  My family would be a global phenomenon, inspiring millions to return to the faith.  I also tried the traditional Catholic bargaining during our hospital stay.  If London lived, she would only attend Catholic school, we would never miss a Sunday service, in short, we would become the poster family of Catholics.  Spoiler alert, God didn’t agree to those terms. 

I think the hardest part of losing my daughter was the shock to my expectations, and that shock almost destroyed my faith.  Fr. Mike Schmitz warns that expectation is a killer of joy, a thief of peace and robs us of God’s presence and I am living proof of that.  I was so angry for the position God had put me in and so jealous of everyone else living in the position I wanted, that I was incapable of accepting reality. 

It is absurd how quickly we as humans can lose our faith in God.  Take one deviated expectation and that will do it.  It is almost comical because essentially, we are declaring, “I, with my finite knowledge as a human, know better than God, in His infinite wisdom as creator of the universe.”  Talk about over-inflated egos. 

A better example comes from Father Walter Ciszek who served as a missionary in Russia for 23 years.  In 1929, as a Jesuit priest, Fr. Ciszek felt as if God were calling him directly when Pope Pius XI requested seminarians relocate to Russia.  Although Fr. Ciszek said yes, when he finally arrived was quickly regretting his decision as his reality vastly differed from his expectations.  (And this was before Fr. Ciszek experienced the solitary confinement and Siberian labor camps). During this time, he expressed his dissatisfaction to God, “It’s not fair.  I never thought it would be like this.  I simply cannot stand it.  And I will not stay.  I will not serve.”  Eventually, as he kept praying, he found the grace to trust in God’s design and in turn gives us one of the greatest lessons in understanding the will of God.   

“The sole purpose of living is to do the will of God and not the will of God as we expected it, not the will of God as we wished it would be.  But rather the will of God that God has envisioned for us and revealed to us each day in reality.” 

My reality is not what I thought it would be when I said those marriage vows.  My husband and I have had to pivot our expectations of what we dreamed our family would be.  I will say though there is something very freeing in giving up control to God.  I had always hated the whole “Give it God,” conversation until recently because I thought it assumed that the individual would be rewarded with a result meeting their approval.  Now I realize it’s all about rejecting expectations and accepting reality, a stance that would benefit us all. 

Bottom line is this: if we are so wrapped up in negotiating our purpose with God, we might miss out on it.  Remember it’s not what you are saying yes to, it’s who.    

“Mrs. L. was Anne Frank even real?”  I almost had an aneurism as a freshman girl asked me this question.  She was holding a copy of I am Anne Frank from my collection of Brad Meltzer’s Ordinary People Change the World series.  I tried my best to speak softly as to not bring more attention to this gregarious conversation and told her, “You are thinking of Helen Keller, and yes, she was real.  In fact, just to clarify, BOTH Helen Keller and Anne Frank were real.”  To my dismay that was not the end of our conversation.  She began arguing with me that Helen Keller could not have possibly existed because how could someone be both blind and deaf?  Then other students started joining in supporting her case!  I could not believe how much effort I had to put into defending the mere existence of such a well-known historical figure.  After a while they finally conceded to her existence but then wanted to down-play all of her achievements and shame Anne Sullivan for her methods and it all just became too much for a 56-minute class period. 

Anyways, the point I am trying to make is this, all over the internet there are what I would call “click-bait” articles attempting to devalue or cancel key historical figures.  Helen Keller is just the tip of the iceberg.  Even Ghandi has haters and Mother Teresa.  Yes, you heard me correctly.  There are people online calling Saint Mother Teresa of Kolkata the “C” word.  I don’t even know where to begin but I’ll try. 

There seems to be a vicious cycle of internal conflict in my heart.  The more I study the Catholic church the more I want to share my findings which leads me to worry about the haters and nay-sayers putting me on the defense before I even have a chance to start. Exhausting, right?  With Lent here and Mother Teresa being spotlighted on Halo I felt an urge to research the stance of her haters so that I could in turn debunk and defend.  Through which I discovered a new Catholic writer I really enjoyed named Claire Swinarski, founder of The Catholic Feminist who posted a letter called, “There are People who Hate Mother Teresa: Like, how dare you?”  She even has a podcast in which she interviews a sister who worked with Mother Teresa for years.  For the record Claire LOVES Mama T.    

When I think of Mother Teresa one of the first things to come to mind is her infamous, “Do It Anyway” poem.  My primary care doctor has it posted on the wall in her exam room and every time I’m sitting on that table I smile as I read it.  I don’t think Mother Teresa gave much worry to what other people said about her so it seems unnecessary that I run hypothetical scripts in my head about how I can put the misguided in their place. 

In today’s world there is a lot of hate online.  It’s easy to post, it’s easy to find and unfortunately it’s easy to get worked up about.  So if you’re like me here is your friendly remind that the truth always reveals itself.  After all, it was never between you and them anyway.              

What can happen when we live our life to glorify God?  Win Games?  Break Records?  Be happier than we ever thought possible?    

AMDG or ad maiorem Dei gloriam.  This is a Latin phrase meaning ‘To the greater glory of God.’ 

When kicker for the Kansas City Chiefs strolled up to the Super Bowl with these letters displayed on his bag, he sent a clear message to the world.  Harrison Butker gives his glory to God. 

Being Catholic is not always popular.  Scratch that, in today’s world, being Catholic is rarely popular.  Especially in the realm of Hollywood and professional sports.  This is what makes it all the more impressive when a key player is willing to use their celebrity status for the good of God. 

So, who is Harrison Butker?  This soccer player turned football kicker like many Catholics stopped going to Mass in college.  Often it is the people who seem to have everything (talent, popularity, success) who in fact feel the most emptiness.  Why?  Because they are craving a purpose.  Harrison Butker found his purpose when he met a punter named Grant on the Georgia Tech football team.  Taken aback by Grant’s unmistakable joy, Harrison found himself returning to the faith and living an authentic Catholic life.

So, what lead a Georgian soccer player to become a three-time Superbowl Champion?  With some impressive stats including longest field goal in Super Bowl history (57 yards) and most Super Bowl field goals in NFL history (9), it leaves one wondering what (or who) is fueling that kick? 

Honestly, if Jesus were to be a football player, I could see His position as a kicker.  Think about it, being a kicker takes immense focus under pressure.  Everyone is counting on you, but once you make the goal you are quickly forgotten.  It’s a rather humbling part to play.

So, what do you think?  Is Harrison Butker’s talent a gift from God manifesting its own destiny or perhaps because Harrison Butker is such a powerful instrument are there some divine intercessions occurring on that football field?  I mean, I’m not saying God is a Chiefs fan, but I’m also not saying God’s NOT a Chiefs fan.  Christus Regnat!  Christ is King!  

I have simultaneously been looking forward to and dreading the season of Lent.  Looking forward to for all the reasons listed in my previous post regarding the magic of Lent.  Dreading because I once again want to challenge myself with the feat of publishing a new post every day, and that, my friends, takes a great deal of time.  As a working mother time is not something I have excessive amounts of, so I have been stressing a great deal about the logistics of this goal.  Will I keep my kids at day care an extra hour while I write or walk around with earbuds in 24/7 while I scan Catholic audiobooks for inspiration?

I should have used the “off season” to create a stockpile of posts I could just copy and paste onto my website each night, but the procrastinator in me obviously didn’t go for that idea.  So, here I am once again at the eleventh-hour stress-eating and reminding myself I produce my best work under pressure. 

Do me a favor and take a moment to think about your goals for Lent.  Now predict what your biggest obstacles might be in meeting those goals.  I would be shocked if time was not on that list.  “Not enough hours in the day.”  It’s our biggest copout.  I mean, we’re not wrong.  It is a valid reason.  It also means that during Lent we just need to work that much harder to not waste time. 

Practice what you preach you say?  Would you like to know my plans for decreasing wasted time this Lenten season?  Well, along with avoiding the vortex that is social media, I also plan to sacrifice other things that I enjoy to create more time for writing and research.  For myself that means cutting back on tv, entertainment, and social outings.  It involves planning on how I can make my workday more efficient so I can leave school in a timelier manner.  I’m sorry bestie but it also means there will be more Halo app playing through my car speakers than our morning phone conversations.  All in all, if you see or hear from me in the next 40 days, I must really love you!  On the flipside, if not, don’t feel too bad because other than my children I’m probably not seeing much of anyone. 

Now don’t worry I am not lost on the irony of what I am saying.  Give up everything non-essential during Lent, such as reading the superfluous writings of a wannabe best-seller like me.  Fortunately for all of us, my years of teaching have ingrained in me a strong desire to “get to the point” and eliminate busy work so I promise to keep it concise and meaningful. 

Therefore, if you would so give me the honor of a few minutes of your time each day for a quick read, I promise in return to inspire, educate, and hopefully entertain you in the process this Lenten season.  So, let’s get together shall we, and see what we can accomplish when we make every minute count. 

There is something magical about Lent, I daresay even more so than Christmas.  Perhaps because we live in a world where Christmas has morphed into the exact opposite of what it should be.  In our culture Christmas has become a season where people increase their anxiety meds just to cope with the pressure.  Throughout finding everyone the perfect gift, creating magical memories, and maintaining family harmony, it’s no wonder that Christ gets lost in Christmas.  Lent on the other hand is different. 

Look closely and you will see a glimmer in the eyes of every Catholic on Ash Wednesday the second they see that dark smudge on the forehead of someone new.  So much more than ashes it’s a sign of community, comradery, and solidarity.  That aha moment of, “Hey, I didn’t know you were Catholic!” On Ash Wednesday Catholics wear their ashes with pride, strutting down the street with the swagger of a quarterback who just won the Super Bowl. 

Funny how a season of sacrifice and self-deprivation can trigger such excitement.  Perhaps because we understand that in the light at the end of the tunnel lies a better version of ourselves.  During Lent we are more active members of the church.  We make pledges to go to mass, confession, fast, and pray with more rigor than we do any other time of the year.  Then, come Easter Sunday we feel reborn and rejuvenated.  So, the question remains, “If Lent is so powerful, why can’t we maintain our stamina year-round?”  Perhaps like anything else the hype has an expiration date.  Just as the cheetah can only last a few seconds at top speed, so do the confines of our humanity. 

              Still, don’t be disheartened, that’s just even more reason to make this Lent the best Lent ever!  If our maximum potential awaits us in these next 40 days let’s make every minute count.  Yes, we should strive to be perfect Catholics all year round, but for now let’s focus on the next goalpost.  Let’s aim to be the best version of ourselves, and let’s do it together! 

Welcome to Lent 2024 everyone.  Let the transformation begin.  It’s game time!      

I don’t know about you, but all this talk about the devil was leaving me feeling a little vulnerable.  Cue to Seal Team Six of spiritual beings, aka the Archangels. The most notorious of which is Michael, whose name means, “Who is like to God.”  Famous for defeating Satan in battle, St. Michael the Archangel is often called upon for protection.  Typically represented as holding a sword and standing over a dragon, most of us are familiar with his prayer, but perhaps not with its history.    

Prayer

“St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the Devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray, and do thou, O Prince of the heavenly hosts, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan, and all the evil spirits, who prowl about the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.” 

Origin

The prayer we all know and love today was composed by Pope Leo XIII in 1886 after experiencing a horrific vision detailing the destruction Satan planned for the world.  Churches were instructed to say this prayer after every Low Mass in the Latin Rite.  This continued until around 1965 when Low Mass ended because of changes within the Second Vatican Council.  However, in 1994 Pope John Paul II urged the faithful to continue to pray to St. Michael the Archangel and as a result many will recite this prayer at the end of the Rosary. 

Role

If you research St. Michael the Archangel, you will find he has four main duties within the Catholic church. 

1. To fight against Satan and other fallen angels.
2. To save souls from Satan, especially in the hour of death.
3. To protect the faithful and the church.
4. To escort souls for their final judgement.

Reputation

• Protector of Israel
• Prince of the Heavenly Hosts
• Leader of Chief Angels
• Exorcist
• Warrior of God
• Guardian of the Church
• Enemy of Satan

Did you know?  Catholics are not the only profession that acknowledges Michael.  Michael is known as an archangel in Judaism and Islam as well. 

Why?

Anyone who desires the triumph of good over evil should pray to St. Michael the Archangel.  Furthermore, if you chose to ignore him, you might be awaiting an awkward encounter when he comes to escort you to those pearly gates in the future…