I have a confession. I don’t go to confession. The end.
No, but seriously, I really do not know anyone that does go to Confession on a regular basis. Let’s face it, it’s an awkward sacrament and with most people these days having a phobia of confrontation, it’s no wonder most Catholics avoid it.
I remember going to Confession in elementary school. We would line up and wait for our turn with the priest. We could sit in a chair or kneel behind a screen. The confession itself was always pretty superficial. You would say something like, “I was mean to my brother,” to which the priest would tell you to say three Hail Mary’s. You would go to a pew, kneel, and pray, then stand back in line while you waited for the rest of your class.
Fast-forward to my college years, my roommate and I proudly decided we would go to Confession one year for Lent. Apparently, this priest thought I was the devil because I barely spoke before he went on a tirade about how sinful college students were with their boyfriends/girlfriends and literally took up almost all his designated Confession time. By the time he was done with me, I walked out to a line full of people judgingly starring at me wondering what could have possibly taken so long. So, no, I was not in a big rush to go back to Confession after that.
Fast-forward more than a decade later, as I was questioning my faith, a parishioner recommended me talking to a particular Opus Dei priest during Confession. I went and he was nice enough (definitely an improvement over the last time) but like most Catholics found excuses not to return.
I feel like the Sacrament of Reconciliation is something that Catholics face a lot of criticism over. Some say it’s a loophole that propagates sin or that no man has the power to absolve you of your sins. In fact, I just laughed as I read a very angry blog post online shaming Catholics who sin and then say, “I’ll just go confess it to the priest next week.” If he had a comment section, I would have challenged him to introduce me to such a Catholic as I have been asking everyone I know when their last confession was and have yet to identify someone who went more recently than six months ago. It’s not just non-Catholics who have issue with Confession.
I think Catholics avoid confession for the obvious. It’s embarrassing to verbally describe your faults out loud to a man of the cloth. I mean just alone that right off the bat I would have to walk in and say, “My last confession was seven years ago…” Yikes! Although Father Mike Schmitz claims to have “divine amnesia” after hearing confessions so I really hope that goes for all priests.
For those that say they do not need a priest, that they can go straight to God with their sins, Father Mike would say great, but you should also go to a priest. He explains that Jesus gave his apostles the power to forgive sins as a mediator, intercessor, tool, etc. for God and therefore wants us to utilize that gift.
He made a good point when he brought up that no religion on Earth baptizes themselves. Why not just go straight to God for your Baptism? He believes it is because of the unease we feel in the act of Confession, and I don’t think he’s wrong.
One of my goals this Lent was to go to Confession and like the true procrastinator that I am, I am running out of time. Today I was reflecting on my vices. The vicious cycles I act on in which always leave me feeling guilty, yet I can’t seem to stop myself from doing. For me, I am hopeful that the sacrament of Reconciliation will help me lessen those bad habits with the people I love. Afterall, Father Mike claims that Confession is not a defeat but a victory. What do you want to be victorious in?